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An Open Letter to Ke$ha

7 Oct

Dear Ke$ha,

Seriously, what the heck is up with your name, despite what you think it is really not that cool. Clearly there is no dollar sign printed on your birth certificate, nor does the dollar sign have any sort of pronunciation value. People don’t think it’s witty or even funny, for the most part they are making fun of you.

I like that you are resourceful but garbage bags for clothes, really? That’s not a fashion statement, you just look stupid. And the human teeth necklaces, they have got to go. That’s just creepy, seriously! Side note – why the F do people send you their teeth, they should also be reprimanded. Oh, and last time I checked you aren’t a vampire, meaning drinking blood on stage is a no-no. Your middle name is Rose, you grew up in Nashville and you’re not lady gaga, ironically enough, she is way more awesome than you.

Your songs are pointless but strangely catchy, and for some reason people love you and all of your crazy antics. So take my advice and don’t go a changin’ because celebrity news would be much less entertaining.

PS. You should probably switch to toothpaste, oddly enough brushing your teeth with a bottle of jack isn’t actually a stellar dental hygiene practice.

Love,

Kim

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One Response to “An Open Letter to Ke$ha”

  1. angie October 7, 2011 at 5:24 PM #

    Brushing your teeth with Jack is bad ? Good to know…….

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